Children in Church

Children in Church 
  
  A little boy was attending his first wedding.
After the service, his cousin asked him, 
“How many women can a man marry?”
“Sixteen,” the boy responded.   
His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly.
“How do you know that?”
“Easy,” the little boy said.
“All you have to do is add it up, like the pastor said, 
4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer.” 
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
After a church service on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced to his mother, 
“Mom, I’ve decided to become a minister when I grow up.” 
“That’s okay with us, but what made you decide that?”
“Well,” said the little boy, “I have to go to church on Sunday anyway, 
And I figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell, than to sit and listen.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A 6-year-old was overheard reciting the Lord’s Prayer at a church service,
“And forgive us our trash passes, as we forgive those who passed trash against us.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon.
“How do you know what to say?” he asked.
“Why, God tells me.”
“Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A little girl became restless as the preacher’s sermon dragged on and on.
Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered,

“Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?”


Ms.  Terri asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their favorite Bible stories.

She was puzzled by Kyle’s picture, which showed four people on an airplane,
 So she asked him which story it was meant to represent.
“The Flight to Egypt ,” was his reply.
Pointing at each figure, Ms.  Terri said, 

“That must be Mary, Joseph, and Baby Jesus.  
But who’s the fourth person?”
“Oh, that’s Pontius – the pilot!”

The Sunday School Teacher asks, 
“Now, Johnny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?”
“No ma’am,” little Johnny replies, I don’t have to. 
 My mom is a good cook.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is the best one.

A little girl was sitting on her grandfather’s lap as he read her a bedtime story.
From time to time, she would take her eyes off the book and reach up to touch his wrinkled cheek.

She was alternately stroking her own cheek, then his again.
Finally she spoke up, “Grandpa, did God make you?”
“Yes, sweetheart,” he answered, “God made me a long time ago.”
“Oh,” she paused, “Grandpa, did God make me too?”
“Yes, indeed, honey,” he said, “God made you just a little while ago.”
Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, 

“God’s getting better at it, isn’t he ?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Work Hard, Do Your Best, Keep Your Word,
Never Get Too Big For Your Britches,
Trust In God and Never Forget a Friend

 

Similar Posts

  • All New to me

    Ok so this is new to me, I haven’t totally figured out what direction I want to take with this but I know it will come with time and I think it will probably come a lot faster than I think. I have ideas ;). So don’t worry, stay tuned!

  • Life

    I had a completely different post that I was working on today and just a few minutes ago I found out that a man that I worked with died last night from a massive heart attack.  When I came to work for the company 4 years ago I met this man.  He worked in our…

  • Week 9

    Happy Birthday to my momma!! How far along? 9 weeks 5 daysTotal weight gain/loss: Still hanging in around +/-7lbsHow big is baby? The size of a Green Olive.  Average size is .9 inches, .07 oz.  Baby is no longer an embryo–its now a fetus.  It is developing more distinct facial features. Week 9 is a…

  • DWTS – Week 7

    So I really thought about calling it Then There were 5 and I could have, no one was holding a gun to my head saying I had to call it DWTS – Week 7 but I figured since that’s what I called all the rest I should keep at it… I might change next week…

  • 45 Tips for Life

    ***taken from an email… but I thought they were good tips***  Enjoy! 1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good 2. When in doubt, just take the next small step 3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone 4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick.  Your friends and…

0 Comments

Leave a Reply to Lourie Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Enter Captcha Here : *

Reload Image