Pretty Woman

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Do I have you singing that song now??

Two of my favorite parts of that whole movie is the second day she goes shopping on Rodeo Drive and she walks into the store where the clerk wasn’t nice to her the day before dragging all her bags of shopping and looking smokin in her gorgeous outfit and says:

Big Mistake, Big, Huge, I have to go shopping now

But one of my other favorite parts is when she has to learn Formal Table setting etiquette.

How many people now days know formal table etiquette?

In my part of the country, it’s kind of gone by the wayside.  I happen to know it, but that’s partially because I received an AFA (Agriculture Future of America) scholarship in college and as part of our acceptance we had to go to Kansas City, MO for a 4 day conference.  One of the things we learned: Table Etiquette.

I think since I learned it in November of 2002, I’ve used it once, maybe twice…  Granted in every day situations I’ll incorporate some of it, but to use it all, nope, not really, just the once (since then).

June and October it seems like are heavily occupied with weddings for a lot of people.  I thought since we are approaching wedding season, you may attend a Formal reception.  So maybe this will help, and again, maybe not but hey it’s all good 🙂

(a) Service Plate or Dinner Plate.  If it is the service plate, it will remain in front of you until the dinner plate is brought out at which time the 2 plates will be switched, otherwise, this is your dinner plate.

(b) Bread Plate.  This is where you set your bread. (hahaha… sounds like such a smartallic answer!)  It is placed right above the forks on the left side of the plate.  (take your left hand, index to thumb to make a “b”, this helps you remember that the bread plate goes on your left)

(c) Dinner Fork.  This is the largest of the forks.  It is placed to the left side of the plate.  Other smaller forks are arranged around them depending when they will be used throughout the course of the meal.

(d) Fish Fork.  It is the smaller fork furthest from the plate to the left.  If a fish course is served, this is the first fork used.

(e) Salad Fork.  If the salad is served after the dinner course, then the fork is placed to the right.  If the salad is served first before the fish then it would go left to right, salad fork, fish fork, dinner fork.

(f) Dinner Knife.  The dinner knife is placed to the right of the plate.  The blades should always face the plate.  It will be the largest knife in the place setting.

(g) Fish Knife.  This is usually a specially shaped knife and it goes to the right of the dinner knife.

(h) Salad Knife.  (please note: it is not shown in the above diagram)  It would be placed in the same manner on the right side as the salad fork, so if the salad were served after the meal, the salad knife would be to the left of the dinner knife right next to the plate.  Remember the blade side faces the plate.

(i)  Soup Spoon or Fruit Spoon.  If soup or fruit is served first, then the spoon goes to the right of the knives.

(j)  Oyster Fork: (remember, Slippery Little Suckers, don’t worry miss it happens all the time… yes I have watched Pretty Woman too many times)  If Shellfish is served during the course of dinner, the oyster fork is placed to the right of the spoons.  This is the only fork that ever goes on the right side of the plate.

(k) Butter Knife.  This small spreader knife is placed diagonally across the butter plate with the handle facing toward the right of the plate.  The blade is down.

(l) Glasses.  (take your right hand, index finger to your thumb forming a “d”, this helps you remember that drinks go on the right side of your plate)  You can have up to 5 glasses at one place setting and they are placed smaller to the front, larger toward the back.  The water goblet (la) is placed directly above the knifes.  Then moving to the right you have (lb) Champagne flute then (lc) Red wine glass, (ld) white wine glass, and lastly (le) sherry glass.

(m) Napkin.  The napkin can be placed in a couple places.  You will find it to the left of the forks.  Under the forks.  You can find it laying across your plate.  Or you can find it in the water glass if your water is still empty.

Dessert spoons or forks will generally come out with the course, however if you have a spoon and or fork placed directly above your plate, then you already have your dessert fork/spoon.

If at any time every place setting is missing one fork, the general rule is it will come with the entree that it is served with.

A great tip to remember which side the silverware goes on whether you are doing formal or casual place settings is picture the word “Forks”.  In order from left to right: F=Forks, O=plate (O shape), Throw out the R, K=Knives, S=Spoons.

So now, which direction do you pass the food?
Food is passed Counter Clockwise or to your right.  That way you allow people time to pass one plate before receiving a second and there is no jam points.

How do I cut my food?
One bite at a time.

How do I excuse myself to go to the restroom?
Place your napkin in your chair.  This signals to waiters that you are not finished and you will be back.

How do I know when to start eating?
When the head of the table starts eating, you are free to eat.

How do I know who is “head of the table”?
Whoever called the dinner to order is the head of the table.  If it is a more casual setting, whoever is setting at the end of the table is Head of the Table.

If ordering from a menu, how do I know the price range to stick to?
The general rule is to stay similar to the price that the “head of the table” is choosing from.

If the head of the table suggests a food….
Unless you are opposed to eating what they have suggested, generally in a more formal setting you order what they suggest.  (ie they suggest seafood and you don’t like seafood, politely decline and pick an entree similar in price).

How do I signal I’m finished to the waiter?
Picture your plate as a clock.  You place your eating utensil(s) handles facing the 4.  (now I’ve also heard you turn them upside down, but I’ve also heard you don’t… if you don’t know, watch others ;)) and place your napkin to the left side of your plate (if you are through with the entire meal).  Leave your plate where it sits, never push it away from you and if you place your napkin on the plate, that signals to the chef that you did not like their food.

Also if you are a man at the table and a lady excuses herself to the restroom, you stand both when she leaves and when she returns.

There’s oh so much more, but I guess I’ll let you digest this all for now and have a fabulous Thursday!

0 thoughts on “Pretty Woman

  1. Ah Pretty Woman…one of my faves! Also, one of my fave moments – my cousin Kayla & I standing in a packed bar discussing how Julia Roberts uses the line in the outtakes of Valentine's Day, and we're in the midst of saying, “Big mistake. Big.” and some random guy walking buy says, “HUGE!” hahaha!!

  2. Someone just had the Rodeo Drive scene on! I love that especially since all these “snotty” salespeople make nothing! Yet, they treat people like they are dirt.

    Fun review, so much to remember. I remember reading that Princess Diana had to learn to not stop eating (as she ate very little) because when she finished everyone else was supposed to also! Not a problem here.

  3. That's actually really cool! Ive never needed proper table etiquette before but if I ever do I'll try to remember these! xo

  4. too many utensils for me…i feel so out of place when i go to a fancy meal that has more than one fork…why can't I just use the same fork for everything?? lol

  5. Totally cool. Thanks for sharing! I learned some of this back in Home Economics (yeah, I'm old enough to have been through it in the 70s).

    I love the diagram and details. I try to set our “formal” table like this Don't use all the utensils though.

    You've inspired me to do a post on this. Or maybe I'll have you do a guest post. 😉

    Stef at TooMuchToDoSoLittleTime.com

  6. HAAAA! I gotta tell ya girl, I totally stopped reading when you got to the forks. I only need one and if somebody doesn't like it, well my big ole hillbilly @ss will just ask them to step outside…………LOL! Good gravy, I just think that's silliness. But I suppose it's just cause I'm such a country bumpkin. ;0)

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